Scape Goat

Last week my daughter turned 9.  She told all of her friends that she wanted an Apple gift card for her birthday so that she could buy her own iTouch.

This, despite the fact that she has a Kindle Fire which is a MUCH better form factor for an internet enabled device that is not also a phone.

Sadly, this fact is not marketed to 9 year olds.

I digress.

Thankfully for me my daughter did not receive the requisite number of gift cards (and associated CASH VALUE) to actually buy the iTouch - yet.  However, it's only a matter of time.

Tonight, as we she talked about how AWESOME it was going to be when she got it, I reminded her that she will not have any "Public" accounts like instagram, Twitter, Facebook, etc until she is older.  And, I mentioned in passing, of course I will be able to monitor her internet usage and texting.

She.Lost.It.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN?" she asked.

"I won't read all of your texts." I told her, but I"ll have access to them.

"BUT WHY?"

"To protect you."

"Don't you trust me?" she asked.

UGH.

I mean, I sort of trust her.  I trust her to WANT to do the right thing but I won't let her carry the burden of having to make the right decision alone.  I want to be her scape goat - the person she can blame when she's facing peer pressure.

My IDEAL situation is that when she's in a situation she doesn't know how to stand up to, she can take a deep breath, breathe easy and say, "I can't do that.  You KNOW my mother will kill me."

And when her friends say, "You're right.  Your mother is a BITCH."

That is my finest moment.

 

Comments

[DaddyRunsALot]

I'll fully admit that the age of mobile networks scares me half to death. Even at the height of wifi, I know that I can route all traffic through a device, and I can monitor all traffic through any given device. In a perfect world, I would have the ability to do so, but would rarely ever feel the need to do so.

But, with mobile networks . . . well, aside from lack of money/opportunity, what's to keep a kid from getting a "burner" cell phone, that's not on my family plan? If it's not interfacing with something that I've set up, it's going to be foreign to me - you know, aside from "my dad would kill me if he knew I was doing this."

So, really, our ideal situations are quite alike, Kit :)

[jyllianM]

Bean is 12 and she has a private instagram and we monitor all texts and emails. She knows that's just the way it is going to be. Probably until she's a junior or senior because the cruelty that's out there and her sensitive soul don't mix well and I'm on this planet to protect her as best I can.