BloggingDangerously

Beauty

This is what my husband and I found on Sunday night when we went in to kiss my 6 year old daughter goodnight.

In case you can't tell, the sleeping mask says "Beauty" on it and she got it for a Goodie Bag prize at a birthday party 2 years ago.  She never sleeps with it so I dont know why it was on the other night.

Tonight when I showed her the picture she threw her head back and laughed and laughed.

When Does It Sink In?

My daughter had a meltdown one morning last week when I was in NYC.   Apparently she didn't want to go to school and started crying.  My husband, not one to give in to histrionics, said, "Get on the darn bus." and she did, crying.

The next day, knowing nothing about this I walked her to the bus stop but when the bus pulled up she burst into tears and said, "I don't want to go."

I brought her home, asked her what was wrong and drove her to school.  She insisted I walk her into the school so I did - reluctantly.

In the lobby there was a little girl my daughter's age that neither of us knew.  We were all standing there waiting for the bell to ring indicating that the kids could go to their classrooms and the little girl looked very awkward while she waited by herself.  

"Go talk to her." I told my daughter. 

"No way." she told me.

Finally the bell rang and she ran off to class as happy as could be.

Over the weekend she told me that she hated the bus because she didn't have any close friends on the bus and some of the other girls had told her "not to eavesdrop" when she tried to participate in their conversation.

I remember this feeling from second grade so I did what I wished I could have done myself back then - I went to my third grade son and said, "Your sister is feeling bad because she doesn't have anyone to sit with on the bus - can you sit with her?"  He looked surprised.  

"She does?" he asked.  I nodded. "Of course I can." he told me.  My fourth grade son piped in, "I can sit with her too!"

On Saturday I went to my husband's gun range by myself for the first time.  I was a little bit nervous because it was the first time I'd fired my pistol without my husband with me and I was sure I'd do something silly that showed everyone I was new - but of course I didn't.  I walked into the range, nodded at the people there and went about my business.  It took about 15 minutes and then I left.  When I got home I said to my husband.  I saw a few people but they weren't very friendly.

Then I realized I hadn't said anything to them either.  I promised myself that next time I went I would introduce myself to everyone I saw and tell them, "I'm new and I figure if I do this every time, eventually I'll know everyone."

This morning my daughter got on the bus happily flanked by her big brothers.  "I'm VERY jealous of you." I told her with them listening.  "When I was little I didn't have a big brother."  She beamed.

The three of them got on the bus and sat down together.  Through the window I could see them laughing.  I could also see one of the little girls that my daughter said excluded her - sitting by herself - neither of her friends had made the bus this morning and she was looking out the window awkwardly.  (Note: I like the little girl.  It's one of her friends that's a mean girl.)

Then I came back to my office and stressed out about the fact that I'm the only person in town without 100 friends.  I always see other people hanging out or talking about going on vacation together so I'm certain that I'm the only one who has no close friends in town.

So I took my woes to Twitter where every single person agreed that making adult friendships was HARD.  Even when we make the effort we run out of time because life gets in the way.

But, dammit, I decided to make the effort.  I called 5 friends and invited them over to play card on Saturday night. I don't even know if they all play cards.  Two of them said 'yes', One said she'd love to but her family is going skiing and the other two haven't called me back.

That's still pretty good, right?

And my daughter?  Well, she and her brothers came off the bus laughing but when I told her about how she hadn't even noticed the little girl sitting by herself this morning I think it dawned on her that she only notices when SHE'S the one who's being excluded.

So hopefully we all learned something today.

 

French Kiss

Oh the joys of the school bus.

Last week my kids complained that they were the "only kids" on the bus who didn't have electronics - iTouches, Kindles, etc. I told them that last year when they had gotten their Kindles, I emailed their teacher to see if they could bring it in and she said that she would be concerned that something would break or go missing. So we decided not to send the Kindles to school.

The kids complained. My daughter even went so far as to try to sneak one of the old iphones into her backpack but it's an old phone with a dead battery.  She didn't get far.

The VERY NEXT DAY I got a mass email from the school principal reminding all parents that electronics are not allowed in (elementary) school.  She mentioned that this INCLUDED the bus because some children had recently taken inappropriate photos on the bus.

AWESOME.

not.

Apparently parents don't read her emails because on Monday, my son's 3rd grade class was AGAIN reminded that electronics were not allowed in school because some children had been caught looking up inappropriate content.

Later my 10 yo son asked my husband was "fingering" was.

AWESOME.

also not.

Tonight at dinner my husband walked around the dinner table to kiss me.  As he bent down all 4 kids started chanting, "French kiss, french kiss, french kiss!!"

He did kiss me.  It wasn't french.

The kids booed.

Awesome.

No, that actually was.

 

Dear Kids, A Dead RAT? WTF? Love, Mom

There is a museum in Massachusetts called Battleship Cove and it has retired Naval ships that you can explore. It's pretty cool and the kids LOVE it although they are insane enough to ask to go there NOW - when it is 0 degrees outside - and they are suprised when we say, "Um, no."

Last summer my husband took the kids one day when I was working in New York. Apparently Battleship Cove was having a very interesting fundraiser where you had to find the "rats" on the ships.  The "rats" were actually stuffed animals and after you'd spent the day playing this really fun game you could buy your very own rat in the giftshop.  Needless to say they came home with 4.

Now let's be clear. I'm not a silly girly type of person who faints when she sees a bug.  Once when I was in college there was a drowned mouse in the sink of the office where I worked and when the female office manager totally freaked I went in and got it and threw it out.  

I didn't love it, but I'm not a wuss.

HOWEVER, in the years since that act of heroism I have learned that I don't PREFER rats so I try to avoid them whenever possible.  Also, gerbils, hamsters, chipmunks, guinea pigs and anything else remote rodent-like.  Oh, ESPECIALLY FLYING RATS, aka bats.

So of course my kids like to taunt me with their stuffed animals.  I have a mini-fridge in my office and whenever I open it there is a stuffed mouse, plastic spider or fake bat.  

So this morning when my daughter stuck her stuffed rat in my house I was unfazed.

"Mom," she asked, "Why don't you like rats?"

To which I replied, "Um, because they're rats?"

To which she replied, "Well there's a dead rat in a bucket in the basement."

To which I replied, "Another stuffed rat?"

And she said, "No! A real rat."

And I said, "Nuh-uh."

And she said, "Uh-huh."

And I said, "Nuh-uh."

And then three of my kids said, "Uh-huh" and one said, "Shhhh" which was the scariest part because that meant it might be true so I looked at my husband and he said, "Nuh-uh."

And they all said, "Uh-huh." and then they all went downstairs to see the dead rat.

Ok it was a mouse - but it was definitely dead.  Apparently it had gotten stuck on a mousetrap and in its thrashing had fallen into a bucket in the utility closet.

When I asked the son who had said, "shhh" why he hadn't told us sooner he said, "Because I didn't want you to make us move."

"How long has it been there?" I asked him.

"About two months." he told me.

At which point I sort of freaked out and said, "IFTHERESEVERANOTHERROTTINGANIMALCARCASSINTHEHOUSEPLEASETELLUS!"

WTF?

Making it Count...

My resolution this year was to focus more acutely on the 5 things I set down as priorities for last year: Family, Work, Exercise,  Cooking and Finances.  

I also added a bonus topic: Play more cards.  

This may seem a little too specific for a list that general but I love playing cards - I love everything about it - I love the camraderie, the competition, the math, the strategy, etc.  I figured that by adding cards to the list I'd be spending time with my children, my husband and friends, while keeping all of us mentally stimulated.

As far as my goals go, this weekend was fantastic.

On Saturday morning we went to a rally at the Massachusetts State Capitol to support the Second Amendment.  It was great to bring the kids to a political rally to teach them about the American political system.  The people that we met that day were wonderful including a reenactor from the Massachusetts 54th regiment who answered all of my son's questions.

Afterwards we planned to head home but detoured through the Boston Museum of Science.  It's an AMAZING museum and we all learn something every time we go.  We have a membership and try to go several times a year.  

Saturday evening we spent hours working on a puzzle that my son had asked for.  He's almost 9 and is fantastic at puzzles.  Then after they had gone to bed, my husband and I played 500 rummy.  

We woke up late - 9 o'clock! - and dressed in running clothes.  My husband and the boys and my baby (6) did sprints in our front yard.  My 7yo daughter and I did sprints around "the block."  It's a mile and we finished it in under 11 minutes.  She was grabbing her side towards the end but she finished strong.

Then I went for a long run.  (5.5 miles.)  When I got back I made chili.  I don't really care for chili but I think that every one should have a good chili recipe.  This one was not that recipe.  (It wasn't bad but it wasn't good either.)

Then my son and I went shopping to buy him a costume for his biography report - yes he has to dress up as the person he is reporting on - General Patton.  We had lunch at Moe's and then shopped for movies at Frye's.  (He was patient with me as I just kept asking, "Why would we buy this here when we have Amazon prime?)

Then we went home and we all played cards for a while until the football game came on.

When the Pats blew their shot I went upstairs to get ready for work.  I flew to NYC today (Monday) and will fly home tomorrow.

I'm not going to lie - it was a LONG two days.  I'm not sure I got to sit down or stop much but I had an amazing time spending one on one time with each of my children and my husband and doing the things I enjoy.

This weekend will hold memories for all of us - strong memories of the protest at the State House and fuzzier ones - of holding my 6yo in my lap while we cheered in our football jerseys.

It's easy to let the time pass - it's harder to make it count but so worthwhile.