Knock, Knock

My husband thinks it's acceptable to knock on the wall to get my attention.  For example, if it's his morning to sleep in and he wants to let me know that the kids are being too loud he won't call down, "Hey can you guys keep it down?" he'll pound on the wall.

I HATE banging and tapping and to me this is akin to tapping your glass on the table if you need a drink refill.  It drives me NUTS!

Anyway, lately he has been getting up early every day to work out so it hasn't been an issue.  Of course it means he's tired at night and goes to bed very early.  So early in fact that I cringe when I hear him coming up the stairs because I'm not EVEN CLOSE to ready to go to bed at 10 and he's yawning his head off.

It stresses me out because it means I have to get ready for bed even if I'm going to go back to my office for 2-3 more hours.

And sometimes when I stay up late he'll wake up, realize I'm not in bed yet and knock on the wall to get me to come to bed. 

Anyway... last night he came upstairs at NINE THIRTY.

He came into my office and gave me a kiss goodnight and went to bed.  I thought about going with him because I wasn't overly busy but I didn't.

And then 5 minutes later I heard, "KNOCK, KNOCK" on the wall.

So I got up, walked to the bedroom and said, "Yes?"

And he said, "Are you ready for bed?"

And I said, "Um. no." and turned to leave and he said, "Do you want to have sex?"

And I said, "Is THAT why you called me in here?"

And he said, "Well, I was going to jerk off but I figured I should give you the right of first refusal."

Yes, my husband has a way with words...

It's really a miracle that I ever find the strength to resist him.

But not this time because I actually turned off my computer and brushed my teeth.

What can I say? My husband is good in bed.

But just as I was crawling into bed, I realized that he was asleep.

So of course I tiptoed back out and worked for a while longer.

You know I'm totally kidding right?  I hit him in the head with my pillow and told him that if I was coming to bed for sex he had better wake up and perform.

And he did.  And you know what? All the banging didn't bother me at all.

Comments

[alisha]

oh the things we can forgive for a great lay. get in where ya fit in, girlfriend.

[Jessie Powell]

Well when it's a GOOD bang, that's different from when he just knocks you up.

(I do LOVE the differences in British and American phraseology.)

[joeinvegas]

Hmmm

[Carm]

LOL! I love you so much it's not even funny!

[Hyacinth - A Dissolute Life Means...]

I should devise this method of communication with my neighbor.

[Stacey]

"And he said, 'Well, I was going to jerk off but I figured I should give you the right of first refusal.'"

I cracked up at that part.

[edenland]

HAHAHA ... oh my god. Fucking golden GOLD GOLD.

I admire your tenacity, Kit!

XXXXX

[John]

This post made me laugh -- I'm an early sleeper, but I never wake up - so, my wife can come to bed whenever she wants, and I wouldn't, ever know the better.

But, yeah, if you're going to say "come to bed and have sex," you need to stay awake. I'm glad he got those toes curling for you :-)

[A Morning Grouch]

knocking on the wall is only okay if it is from the headboard.

[dentist Geelong]

Doesn't that seems annoying? Well as long as he can perform at the least.