I'm Torn Between Mouth Organ and Squeezebox

Before I go any further with what promises to rapidly devolve into adolescent humor, I'd like to ask you a favor.

As you may or may not know, blogging is NOT a lucrative business.  Sure, I make a couple of dollars from the ads on my sidebar and the sponsored posts that you are good enough to put up with but if we're talking about an hourly rate then I make about the minimum wage

...in Botswana.

Luckily for all of us my kids go to bed early enough that blogging isn't really taking me away from anything other than sitting beside my husband on the couch watching documentaries of World War II.  (I know how it ends.)

And sleep.  Lots and lots of sleep.

I know that a lot of people blog because it helps them work through their depression or anxiety.

Apparenly my neuroses are exhibitionism and excessive ambition because not only do I blog about my sex life, I am more than happy to be paid in Web Awards instead of actual cash.

Why am I telling you this?  Because it is, once again, time for the Bloggies, the biggest award in the blog world and I would love it if you would nominate me in the Parenting and Family category. 

If you're thinking that Blogging Dangerously is not exactly Family friendly, I suppose you're right.  I don't aim to be a Parenting: How To and much as I aim to be a Parenting Survival Guide: "Get Through Raising Children by Focusing on the Funny and Stay Married to Your Spouse (and maybe even have some fun) in the Process.

But if you can't bear to pick the Family category, there are lots of other categories; Humor, Best Written and Blog of the Year.  I'm too modest to ask you to nominate me for all of them (unless you REALLY want to.)

Nominations are only open for a short time and you can ONLY nominate once.  This is not a 'please vote for me every damn day' sort of thing.

I would SINCERELY appreciate your support. 

The End.

Of the begging, not the post...

Warning: Adolescent Humor ahead.

Oh wait, I forgot who I was talking to... Nevermind...

So, last month I purchased 6 amaryllis bulbs for my children's teachers as Christmas presents and one for myself.  I planted them all and gave them away.  Mine started to sprout almost immediately.  There were two stalks and the bigger they grew the more I started to think that they looked like...

Well, you be the judge...

Am I wrong?

I think that I deserve about 150 HEAVEN points for NOT taking a photo of it and posting it on Twitter.  (NEVER post naked photos is the first rule of the internet!)

But then I forgot to water it and the stalk started to droop.  And then it started leaning a little bit to the right like this guy I used to know.  Seriously, his 'organ' took a 90 degree left turn.  Lucky for him it had the length to get away with it.

And then every time I looked at my droopy amaryllis (which is on my desk in my office) I started thinking about different organs that I have known and how they all droop this way or point that way or curve up or hook left, or actually bend, etc.

And then today I started thinking that "Organ" is a foolish word so I wiki'd organ and think that "Squeezebox" and or "Mouth Played Instrument" might be better terms for it.

What do you think?

Also, have I mentioned that I don't get much sleep?

PS My amaryllis is beautiful.

 PPS Thanks to everyone who reminded me that I'm a moron for not linking to the Bloggies.  OOPS.

PPPS If this kind of sophomoric humor is your thing, you need to check out today's post by Eden Riley.  Also, watch the video. 

Comments

[dan]

No link to the bloggies?

[edenland]

Your amaryllis looks ENGORGED. xxx

[Kit]

@Edenland You're just saying that because my amaryllis is bigger than your potato...

But mine doesn't have jazz hands. I'm really jealous of the jazz hands.

[The Shell Princess]

Your amaryllis looks quite well cared for and loved. Lucky amaryllis. I think you deserve all kinds of awards for being hilariously genuine. I'm on it.

[John]

You know me, I'm partial to "organ," but, well, I play with mine often.

[Ken]

What John said...and I very happily nominated you in the category of your choosing. Cheers!

[Michelle P.]

I voted because I found you via the Bloggies last year!