I grew up the oldest of three children. I have a younger sister and a baby brother and like many girls in my situation I believed that my life would have been a cakewalk if I'd only had an older brother to pave the way.
So I was THRILLED to give birth to TWO sons before my two daughters.
Until tonight.
Tonight my husband took the boys to football while the girls and I stayed home. When this happens the girls and I start their showers right away so that they're bathed and ready for dinner and then bed when the boys get home - late.
I tossed the girls in a bubble bath together with Barbie and Ken and figured I'd let them play for a bit. And then I got a call from coworker on West Coast time.
As we chatted I heard the sounds of inconceivable FARTING, followed by HYSTERICAL laughter coming from the bathroom.
Later, when the boys were home and we were all eating dinner, I said, "Girls, show the boys how you were entertaining yourselves in the bathtub."
Both girls screwed up their faces and proceeded to provide an encore performance.
"I NEVER did this when I was a child." I told them.
"I take back EVERY SINGLE THING I said about the benefits of having OLDER BROTHERS!"
There was a 3 second pause and then my 7yo figured out what I meant and objected, "HEY!" he yelled.
And then he gave me a noogie.
And then he gave me a wet willy.
OH NO!!! I am an oldest child of three - brother and sister, also. I am SOOO glad I didn't have anyone ahead of me. And I am thankful that we moved before my siblings started school...otherwise that whole "you are an extension of me" thing would have really brought me down as they are total and complete mental, no polar, no GLOBAL opposites from me!!! If we didn't look JUST LIKE OUR MOTHER I would swear they were aliens or test tube babies or adopted or something!!!
www.oatestosow.blogspot.com
Posted by: Charisse | September 21, 2011 at 10:05 AM
yup. boys and farting. and boys bringing out the farting in their sisters. life doesn't get any simpler
Posted by: Whitney Soup | September 21, 2011 at 10:47 AM
I'm the oldest and I often wished I had an older sister to help me along the way. I gave birth to a son first and I hope that some day my daughters will appreciate that. Right now he's just the big brother that picks on them.
Posted by: Amber | September 21, 2011 at 12:32 PM
Ha! My mom had my sister and I and couldn't wait for us to have girls, and ended up with three grandsons instead. My son is her first and at the ultrasound she asked, "What am I going to do with a grandson? I don't know about boys!!" Little did she know the minute Noah and then my nephews subsequently popped out she'd be over and done with. They OWN her.
Anywhoooo, I have 2 older boy cousins and two younger ones, who grew up four blocks away, going to the same schools as we. We were at Aunt Sharon's house before and after school because she watched it. Raising a boy is nothin' for me. I can keep up with every burp, fart, poop and butt jiggle - just not in front of my prissy husband.
Posted by: Kim Pugliano | September 21, 2011 at 01:06 PM
Hang on, I have two older brothers and I'm fairly certain that I never... oh, wait. Never mind.
Posted by: aem2 | September 21, 2011 at 07:16 PM
I have 2 boys and a daughter and she is famous for running around in her frilly pink dress and "farting" and "burping"...My only hope is that her brothers will protect her when she is older...PLEASE let that be the pay off..
Posted by: Motherhood Truth | September 21, 2011 at 10:28 PM
I still maintain that older brothers are a big help to younger sisters. But, yeah, fart humor is funny.
Posted by: john | September 22, 2011 at 09:51 AM