WARNING: This post is going to start out a little ranty. Normally I write these posts and then delete them - no one wants to read ranty crap - but somehow this one ended on a high note so here it is.
This week I kind of got slammed by the Boston Globe* for enabling mom's to be alcoholics.
Seriously.
If someone goes out after work for a couple of beers it's called, 'letting off steam.' but if you're trapped in the house with incontinent little people who can't carry on a conversation for days on end, you're not allowed to spend a couple hours online (because you can't leave the house, remember?) chatting with women who've been there or who ARE there who can keep you sane and give you hope?
I.CALL.BULLSHIT.
Which brings me to my next topic - Sex.
You have this AMAZING body that can do all sorts of cool things and then you turn it over to its evolutionary responsibility - reproduction - and all sorts of things get ruined and whacked out of joint and you're supposed to deliver the baby and go right back to being the 20-something nymphette you were before. Oh, and not talk about it if you don't.
Ridiculous.
Motherhood is hard. Getting pregnant is hard, Being pregnant is hard, Delivering a baby is hard, Parenting a newborn is hard, Parenting Toddlers is hard and, as I was informed today by a complete stranger who said, "You don't know how easy you have it." APPARENTLY parenting TEENAGERS is hard.
And every stage is hard in a different way - so you don't even get good at it after a while... And if you're friends are out of phase with you - then you really don't have anyone to turn to...
Except me.
Because that's what this blog is about - about talking about the things that you're not supposed to talk about. About talking about how stressful work is or how hard parenting can be or how much suburban life resembles HIGH SCHOOL or about how long it's been since you've had sex because you're so EFFING tired ALL THE TIME but GOD DAMN doesn't that beautiful little vibrator take the edge off during naptime!
Today's post is about all of us women who do these impossible things day after day, year after year and do them so FREAKING well that people think it's actually "Normal."
You are a ROCKSTAR.
Also, believe it or not, but this post was sponsored by EdenFantasys.com. They are giving me a $25 gift card for this post (they may not have realized what they were getting themselves into) and I've decided that I would like to spread the love - or, rather - hedonism.
So leave a comment telling me why you are SUPERWOMAN - or why a mom you know is SUPERWOMAN and I will choose one commenter to receive the $25 gift certificate to EdenFantasys.com for a little more SELF LOVE.
And I will definitely see you at #wineparty!
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY. YOU ARE AMAZING.
*PS I'm from Boston and the Globe is full of shit.
**Disclosure: Since I'm giving the gift card away I was technically not paid for writing this post. And besides, you all know that I LOVE vibrators!
Bull shit indeed. Go Kit go. This is all hard and no one should make it harder. I thank you for making it easier for me.
Posted by: Kassia | May 06, 2011 at 09:12 AM
I'm in!!! My wonderful friend and neighbor is Supermum... her husband is home for 1 day/week, they are trying to sell their house - to spend more time together. What does this mean? That is needs to be SPOTLESS 24/7.
She has 3 redheaded girls (as I have 2 redheaded girls myself... I can assure you - redhead=fire to say the least.) She is class mum to 2 of her girls, involved in local volunteering, sports, music lessons, etc. and still puts a wonderful meal on the table and gets the girls' homework done each night.
If anyone I know needs a little "extra lovin" it is her... (or maybe me too... never been able to "get there" by myself...) (tear :)
Truly, a little "love" would go a long way for her, I am sure!
Pick me, pick me!! :)
Posted by: J | May 06, 2011 at 09:12 AM
Agreed! the Globe is shit, but then again so is the Herald.
I don't have kids, but I am right there with you on #wineparty. I see no evidence of anyone being an alocholic nor neglicting their kids. I see moms and dad across the world getting together and letting off steam and getting ideas on how to be a better parent. I guess the stupidly named 'Mommy blogs' are ok as long as they are full of sunshine and unicorns.
I read your blog because it is funny and it give me hope that maybe one day when I do have kids, I'll survive it.
Posted by: Meg | May 06, 2011 at 09:23 AM
I feel like a supermom, at least sometimes. But I wish I felt more sexy. Anyway - I wiggled with infertility, had an ectopic pregnancy and a miscarriage - thn gave birth to my son. 2 months later found out I was pregnant with twins. Made it though most of my son's first year pregnant with twins - carried them to 38w2d, and gave birth to 2 perfect girls. Then one died at 6 days old. Of a freak heart thing.
It's been over a year, both Maggie and cam are healthy and happy kids... I'm working full time and I think that it's a minor miracle that I held it all together. Oh, I've needed lots of wine - and there is nothing wrong with that!
Posted by: Cece | May 06, 2011 at 09:31 AM
I don't feel like supermom, but I feel the burden of all the responsibilities that would come with that. I am always thinking about what needs to happen next to make everyone's day/night go smoothly. Always. I seem to always be doing something. Plus, my day job is to pamper people, relieve pain, etc all day long. I might deserve five minutes :)
Posted by: Tracy | May 06, 2011 at 09:42 AM
oh, I am all for this!! And WHO said nobody wants to read the ranty posts? I LOVE the ranty posts.
Posted by: drhoctor2 | May 06, 2011 at 09:44 AM
I'm not a regular commenter, but I definitely wanted to say something about this post!
I love that you are here for us moms... I don't get to attend #wineparty every time, but I LOVE it when I do. It is a great way to meet other moms/women/Twitter friends! I also count on your blog to provide a good story and help me feel more like an adult with her own mind and her own goals rather than like "just a mom". I am so glad I found you, because you never let us forget that we are hot, smart, sexy, amazing WOMEN, even if we have little ones that take up a lot of our time & energy. Who cares about the Globe?
I am a superwoman because I am still, after a lifetime of bullshit, forging forward and not letting anything stop me from being who I am. You and all the other strong women I have met online and in real life(including my own mom, who has been through hell in a handbasket & still works harder than anyone else I know)remind & encourage & inspire me every day & I love you for it.
Posted by: FlyteAphrodite | May 06, 2011 at 09:49 AM
Ugh. Loved your post. Hate Mother's Day. Freakin' tired of everything. (Yeah, I'm not one of the sunshine and unicorns moms).
Posted by: Justmewith | May 06, 2011 at 09:59 AM
I'm gonna drink wine right now at 9:55am. Suck it, Boston Globe.
okay, I'm kidding about cracking open the wine right now...but that's lame...half the people aren't even drinking at #wineparty - it's a social hour, not a drunk fest
Anyways, I am superwoman because I can walk three ~100lb dogs with a baby on my back and look totally hot while doing it.
Like, literally totally hot. Sweat streaming down my face & back hot.
Posted by: Dana K | May 06, 2011 at 09:59 AM
You rock Kit. Thanks for being there for us and getting us all together!
I am not a superwoman, more like a surviving woman. Two kids, three dogs, my aging Dad, a husband who travels for work all the time all under one roof. Everybody needs me for something - even the dogs nag me! Trying to find a job. Some days the best you can do is be glad the house is still standing. Cheers!
Posted by: Samantha D | May 06, 2011 at 10:40 AM
I love this post..
I cried at Cece's comment. THAT mama deserves a medal and any sexy toys she can get!
Yes.. I am a mom - who will be 49 next week. My marriage is falling apart - and I am fine with it. It has been for several years but this is the year I have finally 'had enough' - boundaries were crossed and I am tired of being the 'good' wife and the 'good' mom who was sticking it out so my kids would have a stable family life... I've put up with a lot of shit and all that will change soon.
So.. no fairy tales here... I live in a very rural area, have not worked full-time in 16 years, left a fabulous career to 'be this woman'. And, well.. back to the salt mines I go!
And, that is life! I had my kids 'late' in life: When I was 35 with the first, 36 with the 2nd. And, they are the best kids! I would not change a thing on how I got to this point in my life. Every forgotten milestone, every fight, every heartbreak has a bright side - Karma!
And winefest? Hello!!!!!
Posted by: Andi Sexton | May 06, 2011 at 10:52 AM
Awesome awesome awesome post! HUGE *high five*
As a mom of a toddler, a tween, and an adult, I can assure you EVERY stage is hard. Every stage is also rewarding. Too easy for some parents to forget what trials and tribulations they went through with little ones once those babies aren't babies anymore. (Why I started all over is a LONG story, but I got a HUGE reminder just how tough raising a toddler is - and he turns 2 end of this month...complete with the joys TWO brings...and he's a *good* baby, just a normal, healthy baby, complete with the occasional tantrum - one of which he just finished a few minutes ago.)
So the hell what if Mom wants to toss back a couple at the end of a LONG HARD day?? She's earned it.
Happy Mother's Day to YOU! And thank you for your rant - LOVED it!
Posted by: Prosey | May 06, 2011 at 10:57 AM
I was superwoman today when I attended my first pre-school even in my daughter's class. One of those is-it-still-high-school-because-if-so-I'm-thriving suburban moms spoke to (corrected?) me like a cheerleader to the fat kid and I roundhouse kicked her in the head without spilling a drop of my coffee. (And I'm not even fat.)
www.theundertoad.com
Posted by: Claire Wait | May 06, 2011 at 10:57 AM
You are the rockstar for saying all of that out loud. I thought I was the only one who blew off steam during nap time.
Posted by: Amber | May 06, 2011 at 11:33 AM
Dear Kit,
My name is Prudence McAsshat and I totally agree with all your critics. You are defiling the American Dream by saying that Motherhood is hard. Why, nothing could be farther from the truth! I, personally, find cleaning toilets emotionally fulfilling. Moreover, if I can just have some extra laundry to keep me occupied, I am happy as a clam. I also enjoy being at the beck and call of small people, and find that constantly fulfilling the wishes of my children, even at the expense of my own needs, is wonderfully energizing. I use this extra energy to make bread from scratch using wheat I threshed myself.
If you just realized how effortless motherhood is, you wouldn't need to drink like a wanton lush.
I simply must go on to chastise you for implying that women who have become mothers enjoy "the act". My goodness! I'll have you know that real mothers don't enjoy "the act" at all, and only do it to please their husbands. Furthermore, real mothers never, ever have orgasms! If you enjoy yourself in any way, especially with "the act", then you are a brazen hussy and not a real mother. Worse, you might be a Democrat.
Please stop corrupting the morals of the mothers who read your blog. Stop writing about sex, and start listing recipes and helpful cleaning tips instead.
Sincerely,
Prudence McAsshat
Posted by: Betty Fokker | May 06, 2011 at 12:03 PM
I could give you a sob story about how infertility rocked my world and how when I finally got pregnant and had a baby girl she was born with a cleft lip. She had a surgery, and in the midst of all this I found out that my husband has been having a "texting" affair with a co-worker who he now insists that they are just friends. The real reason I am a supermom - despite all of this and not running to timbuktu, is that last night I shared my quesadilla with my daughter without begrudging one delicious crunchy cheese filled bite!
Posted by: Camille | May 06, 2011 at 12:10 PM
Does it count if I say why my wife is a superwoman? She's a stay at home mom to our boys (who can be quite the handful). Recently, my older son (age 7) was punched in the stomach at school. When the principal and teacher gave us shifting stories (including blaming our son for "starting the fight" and saying our son "isn't the type to be bullied"), my wife stormed into the school and pulled him out. He's been home a week now and she (and I) refuses to let him back in that school if they can't ensure it is a safe place.
We're already met with the superintendent and toured a private school (looks great but tuition costs $$$$$$ :-O ). She's a teacher by trade so she knows the ins and outs of the educational system. She knows all of those acronyms like 504, IEP, ERR that I have no clue about. She knows our rights as parents and our kids' rights and makes sure they're followed.
I was horribly bullied as a kid and to see her take such a strong stand in support of our kids makes me very happy. :-)
Posted by: TechyDad | May 06, 2011 at 12:32 PM
Loved this post. That's all I'm gonna say.
oh, and Happy Mother's day.
Posted by: Kris | May 06, 2011 at 12:43 PM
I'm in... My good friend and neighbor is Supermum. She has 3 redheaded girls... (being the mother of 2 redheaded girls, I can assure you that redhead = fire!!!) Her husband is home 1 day a week. They are trying to sell their house to spend more time together... What does that mean? It means that the house needs to be spotless at all times.
She is a room mother to 2 of her girls, is involved in the volunteer women's group in town. She is involved with cheerleading, the town play, you name it... she does it... Still she is sure to make sure everyone's homework is done, a fabulous dinner is served, lunches packed, and books read. She is inspiring.
Also, if anyone could use a little love, it's her!!!
Please help to make her evenings a little more exciting!!!
Thanks, Kit!! xo
Posted by: J | May 06, 2011 at 12:46 PM
I am assuming the person who wrote the article is a MAN! Men just don't usually understand how much work goes into being a mother. You are the "go-to" person for everything. You make sure their world runs smoothly and that everything is in order and that they are safe. More power to ya!
I just found your blog about a month ago and can I say it has rocked my world. I've been married over 30 years and my children are grown and own their own (thank goodness!!!) Keep on doing what you are doing. We love it.
Posted by: GW | May 06, 2011 at 12:48 PM
My mother, who is mom to 2, and gmom to 5, is a supermom. She raised us for the first 8 yrs by herself in the midst of conniving and backstabbing relatives, while our father was overseas. There wasn't one thrown slipper, pinch in the arm, pull on the ear, or whack on the butt that she didn't administer without loving affection. Which taught my sister and me how to be disciplined respectful adults, as well as awesome moms. I'd like to recommend her, but I'm afraid she wouldn't quite appreciate the prize...given she wouldn't know what to do with it and might just give it to her grandkids to play with. YIKES. She's old school...
Posted by: RJ | May 06, 2011 at 01:06 PM
The Good News: The Boston Globe wrote about you.
The Bad News: The Boston Globe wrote about you.
Your blog and Rob Zombie are pretty much the only things I can stomach that come out of Boston. ;)
I take my hat off to moms and pregnant women everywhere. I see what you go through and how hard you work at what sometimes must feel like a thankless job. (raising kids and a husband)
Keep up the good work.
Posted by: Anthony C | May 06, 2011 at 01:08 PM
I'm not a mother. But I do know my mother is one of the greatest superwomen I know, and my sister ROCKS so hard at motherhood, despite how crazy my nephew is ALL THE TIME.
Still, I feel like a superwoman today because I just aced all of my finals in my hardest semester ever!
And you. You are always a rockstar. Thanks for being so honest and all around awesome!
Posted by: Iris | May 06, 2011 at 01:11 PM
Wow, Boston Globe. Get over yourselves.
I AM SUPERMOM. Because I do it, and I survive, and I've managed not to hurt my children (I hope). I survived a near-death pregnancy and a second high-risk pregnancy, mostly intact. I advocate for my special-needs child, while making sure his general-needs brother feels just as special as he does. I take time for myself, because I know that makes me a better wife, mother, and friend. I nurture and adore my relationship with my husband, who is my bestest friend in the world, because I know the kiddos are going to leave us someday, and this is the person who I get to spend forever with when that happens.
Happy Mother's Day, Kit. I know you'll have a great one!
Posted by: Aimee | May 06, 2011 at 01:26 PM
I'm with Prudence. All the way.
Great post. So very well said.
I think I'm a superwoman because every time I want to run out the door, I stay. Every time I think I just can't take the stress of one more day, I make it through. Every time I am sure I can't do something, I find a way.
I have to quote FlyteAphrodite "I also count on your blog to provide a good story and help me feel more like an adult with her own mind and her own goals rather than like "just a mom". I am so glad I found you, because you never let us forget that we are hot, smart, sexy, amazing WOMEN, even if we have little ones that take up a lot of our time & energy."
Posted by: Rebecca | May 06, 2011 at 01:26 PM
Thank you for posting this. Seriously. I have been at home with my newborn for the past four weeks and have come dangerously close to absolutely losing it. You are totally right -- it is incredibly hard. Sometimes I just need to be reminded that I have accomplished so much by carrying this baby for nine months, delivering him and surviving the first month of motherhood. I AM a rockstar.
Posted by: Misty | May 06, 2011 at 01:27 PM
My Mom.
My parents adopted 3 children because they couldn't have any of their own. My mom stayed home with us while my dad worked long days, long weeks, long months to provide for us and make sure we never went hungry.
The first was a newborn (me).
The second not long after that was a young boy a few years older than me taken from his home and placed in foster care.
The third not too long after that, they found this boys younger brother (who was my age) in another foster home. They fought long and hard to adopt him to keep the boys together. [There was another, but had he not already been adopted by another family they wouldn't have hesitated to take him too.]
This younger brother was diagnosed with a host of mental and physical disabilities making life extremely difficult. He couldn't speak, couldn't read, couldn't dress himself, wasn't toilet trained, was physically abusive to everyone... the list went on.
The older brother went through his early teenage years acting out with a host of drug and alcohol addictions and mental anguish (read as constantly running away from home, stealing, lying, etc) from years of torment, neglect and abuse (both physical and emotional) from his parents. They were unable to help him undo his past he was trying to desperately to hide from.
We lived in a rural area where there were no supports, and certainly no one like us to provide my parents with a desperately needed social network or empathy group.
I was bullied for being adopted. I was bullied for having an older brother who was a trouble maker. I was bullied for having another brother who was, at the time, labeled "generally retarded". I loved being at home because it was the only place I felt accepted, loved and chosen because I was.
Sometimes the house was messy. Sometimes we had take out for dinner. Sometimes my mom cried. Sometimes she had that extra glass of wine or two after dinner. And she totally deserved it.
Happy Mothers' Day to the only woman I know that could have survived raising our family with her sanity and come out the other side shining.
Posted by: Alanna S. | May 06, 2011 at 01:32 PM
I'm, obviously, not a woman. I have a deep voice, and an Adam's apple. And a penis. So, I'm obviously not qualified to write about how much of a superwoman I am.
That said, momma - you rock. Seriously. I learned, not long ago, that parenthood is about survival. Becoming a father is, easily, the most difficult thing I've ever done.
You, however, have not lost a sense of yourself (I sometimes feel my "inner self" drifting away as I get lost in responsibility and lack of sleep), and because of that, you're like my hero.
You're a mom, and you like sex. You're a mom, and you need a break every now and then. You're a mom, and you're a fabulous writer. You're a mom, and you're Kit. You never forget that, even when "being a mom" means that you can't have sex, or a drink, or
You make no apologies for who you are, and it seems that you know who you are better than most anyone out there.
Happy mother's day, Kit - and, yeah, the Boston Globe is a douchenozzle...one giant douchenozzle.
Posted by: John | May 06, 2011 at 02:11 PM
The Globe can blow me, kiss my ass, and do my laundry. There.
And I'm going to say *I'M* the Superwoman today, because I have managed to hold my shit together for nine weeks. Nine weeks of my husband living 900 miles away (with my parents, no less), while our house here languishes on the market and we pray no one snaps up the house we want out there. NIne weeks of being a single mom to two intensely complex sons. NIne weeks of keeping my house spotless, ready for a showing at literally a moment's notice. Nine weeks that included xrays for one kid, insane school projects for another, and a repetitive stress injury in my wrist. Nine.Weeks.
I could really use some self love.
And wine.
Posted by: Laughingatchaos | May 06, 2011 at 02:24 PM
Boston Globe, may I remind you that it's 2011. Is the clutching of the pearls really necessary? Kit, you're wonderful, and I think your readership stats tell you that. I know I don't always comment, but I read every post.
As for why I feel like Superwoman, I'm the wardrobe coordinator for a theatre. This means I: do the laundry, repair the costumes, steam the wrinkles out, help the actors dress, etc. I feel like a mother to the whole cast! It can get very exhausting though--six hours straight, and the only time I get to sit down is when I have to sew something. And forget about getting a break; the last time I got a sick day while working a show was in college in 2006. But nothing compares to the feeling of watching my actors get out on that stage and perform, hearing the audience go crazy for them, and knowing that I'm a part of making that magic happen.
Posted by: Downloadable08 | May 06, 2011 at 02:32 PM
I came to comment again because I feel like I need to add on to my comment. So - after all the shit I went through - Maggie was a super hard newborn. She was allergic to milk and had acid reflux. And because her sister died, I was so sure that she missed her twin, and let her go on like that for 4 weeks. I felt awful for not thinking it could have been something physical... but at the same time, here I was with a baby that would cry for an hour and a half, then pass out for 45 minutes... all day long. And I felt like I couldn't admit that it WAS AWFUL. And because of the f-ed up way people potray newborns and how they are all sunshine and rainbows, I was a freaking mess (no help that my first born was a total angel -= so I thought I was doing everything wrong)
Guess what? Raising children isn't all smiles and unicorns. I've pretty much been through it all - and I wouldn't give up being a mom to aviod any of it. My children are wonderful. But some days, they are whining, miserable little ankle biters that stress me out and I need to have a HUGE gin and tonic to relax. And honeslty, also to help me get in the mood for adult activites, thanks to the awsome body I'm left with after having 3 babies in less than two years, I don't feel sexy 100% of the time.
Posted by: cece | May 06, 2011 at 02:53 PM
Ran across your blog on twitter and though my boys are in late twenties, early thirties, oh I can relate still to your posts! Where were you twenty years ago? Oh yeah, no internet then, and don't tell me, you were probably a kid yourself!! Being a mom is tough, so raise your glass of wine, each and everyone of you, you deserve a huge hug and kudos for what you do every day! (just a hint of things to come, it is a relief when you have your own time again, but you never stop worrying about them!) Happy Mother's Day to all of you!!
Posted by: JaneAnnThompson | May 06, 2011 at 03:37 PM
I was supermom yesterday when I hauled all three kids to my older daughter's soccer practice. I stood nearly an hour on the sidelines with a 17 pound 5 month old in a baby bjorn. Hey, it's the only workout I get these days.
And, yes. the double standard bs is amazing. Men can go out for happy hour(s), but a mom can't have a beer when the kids are in bed? Eff that noise.
I don't get to go to #wineparty... because Friday night is date night. Which my husband and I desperately need!
Posted by: red pen mama | May 06, 2011 at 04:03 PM
I don't like to call myself "Super" anything. The last year and a half I've battled and survived Luekemia, with a 7 yr old and a 4 yr old... That's some tough shit to have to handle when your sick!! My sex life is failing on life support! (we maybe have sex once a month, if my hubby's lucky.)
I don't get to have #wineparties or #drinkmyassoff / #getwasted when my kids drive me absoulutly batshit crazy. It's because I'm on a doctor forced proabition, due to medication. I won't be able to drink for a least two more years!!! how much does that suck!
I know I have little hope of winning this, but WE could really use some help(read: relief) in the bedroom.
Posted by: Jessica | May 06, 2011 at 05:20 PM
MY mom is a supermom. She got pregnant at seventeen and delivered my brother despite lack of support from her own mother and the father. She delivered me three days after my grandfather died, on the day of his funeral, after a full day of washing, cleaning, and cooking old school. And she delivered my younger brother, brought him home, and took care of the three of us alone after my father had to return to work the next day. She's had to start over from nothing three times in her life, suffered a disease that stole a large part of her twenties. She is amazing, and still has an innate kindness and compassion that surprises me everytime I'm with her. She's a supermom because she helps people no matter what postion she finds herself in, she's incredible because she lives her life honestly and meaningfully so that we can follow in her example. Don't get me wrong, I'd rather the card go to one of the other supermoms since I've no desire to explain to her why I'm giving her an EdensFantasys.com gift card. I just want to say that she's no less to me because she drinks a wine cooler at one of our birthday parties or even just during a movie night. #wineparty ftw!
Posted by: Grateful Daughter | May 06, 2011 at 06:13 PM
My daughter is in her mid twenties. I wish I had #wineparty when I was a young mother. (I also went back to school full time to finish my degree after my daughter was born and worked part time and kept a house for my husband and his grandfather.) So I'm glad to be part of #wineparty. I think anyone who says that motherhood is easy has never been a mother. It is challenging and so rewarding at the same time. I wouldn't have traded the experience for anything else!
Posted by: adelheid_p | May 06, 2011 at 07:40 PM
I shall keep this somewhat anonymous because it may be unpopular...
Why am I a superwoman? *sips a little zin and prepares to rant*
My extended family has issues. And I always sort of knew that, but it was confirmed last week...
...The day my husband left town for three days...
...and I had to be alone with all four of our little blessings. And march in a parade with them. I took them to the zoo afterward, because it was better than being at home...
...with the reminders of the aforementioned family and the emotional upheaval on that side of the family. The hubby came home on Sunday...
...and on Monday, three of the blessings were home because of a teacher inservice day. This was after the other blessing being home on the Friday before for... I don't know why. Because two Fridays in a row would tax him? I dunno...
...The hubs left again on Tuesday morning for three more days. I had to take two girls to a Scout meeting on Tuesday night and one boy to a Scout meeting on Wednesday and all four to a school concert on Thursday....
...With the aforementioned family in attendance...
...And then had a doctor's appointment with one girl this morning. While the oldest blessing was, again, HOME FROM SCHOOL. Perhaps even one Friday in a row is too much...
...And then went to the other three blessings' school this morning to be CELEBRATED with sugar and coffee--which I'm not opposed to, but might as well just be PLASTERED TO MY THIGHS...
...And then DH came home this afternoon. And promptly LEFT again to take kid #1 to a merit badge class, which apparently goes all day tomorrow, too.
And did I mention that the DH will also be travelling NEXT weekend, too?
And that I'm trying to edit my second novel while all of this is going on?
And maintain a blog?
And not go postal on my parents, my kids, or my husband?
*sips a little more zin*
I gotta say... if it weren't for the wine (and whiskey, and vodka, and margaritas--in as much moderation as I'm capable of at the moment), y'all would be hearing about a murder/suicide in Oregon right now. I've broken up God-only-knows how many "yes/no" fights today... I had one child weeping yesterday because the school served corn instead of peas for lunch... I've lost count of how many times my oldest has accused me of "never listening" to him... And I just walked into the bathroom to hand my 3rd kid a bar of soap in the shower after he's been sitting (yes, sitting--not standing) in there for ten minutes without noticing he had no soap.
I love my kids more than my own life--I swear to God I do--but if I seriously don't get out of this house without them soon, I'll likely turn into something out of "The X-Files."
*sips more zin*
I feel a little better now. Thanks for letting me rant.
Posted by: Anonymous | May 06, 2011 at 09:54 PM
..got married in my early 20s because i HAD to.At that time to get married because a guy made you pregnant was the right "Catholic" thing to do.(I dont mean to be disrespectful)
I was in a whirlwind of getting pregnant,rearing,raising children until the age of 36..
All four of them.All-hyperactive-four of them : )
Yes I love them,no question at all.
Its just that sometimes they get the best of me : )
Fast forward to today.
I raise them up semi-alone. Hubby works some place else. I drive them,teach them,do household manly stuff(paint,plumbing,if need be if there's no budget for a painter or a plumber, or mostly to be an example to my boys on how a man of the house should act),go get all of them involved in sports,
try to teach them about the birds and the bees, and how to clean their _ after they were circumcised(hehe you get the point)
all these and manymanymany more
That has been the case for 3 years now.
Sorry to hang the dirty laundry,but i havent had an O for the past 3years with him(
Though saying I think Im too tired to (feel) to love him when hes here, Im the good W and do IT when he wants to.
Ive been dreaming to buy a toy all this time but aside from being shy and afraid to buy in a store,I think of it as not "financially" wise to buy a $150 multiple function silicone toy,so I resort to S chat when the kids are asleep to revv me up and THEN use my hands to finish the job(i meant fingers)
(Change tone here)
My children call me that.Supermom.
I have been taken the crown for a bit when i was working full time due to very busy and long work hours, but three years ago I regained the title .
So cool, my boys,thank you!!
I think to be called a Superwoman is waaay so much more a name than what I deserve to be called.,
but a super Woman?
Hell yeah !
Posted by: Lone Lee | May 07, 2011 at 04:28 AM
and HAPPY MOTHERS DAY to all especially to you Ms.Kit :)
I have been reading your blog for less than a week but am so much inspired and strengthened already.
Keep healthy and fun always,
Posted by: Lone Lee | May 07, 2011 at 08:46 AM
Great post. The first I've read of your blog. Love the danger.
I'm a supermom because I put up with so much competetive, unfriendly, immature BS from so many parents at my littles' school. Complaining about EVERYTHING not being good enough. Or that other mom who didn't do enough. Or their child's friend who isn't clean enough. Or quiet enough. Or nice enough. Had it up to the proverbial HERE. So done I just want to quit everything and move to the country so we can raise our own food and I don't have to go to the grocery store anymore. Well, that idea needs some work, but you get the picture.
I love my kids, I do. But they are annoying little people with faults and flub-ups and they talk too much. They're growing too fast, and I can't seem to slow life down. I love my time alone, but miss them when they're gone. I'm exhausted after an hour in their company. Guess I'll stay, but the beer I had with two amazing fish tacos last night was beautiful, and even though I fell asleep within 10 minutes of starting a movie with my littles, I don't feel bad this morning.
Posted by: Debbie S. | May 07, 2011 at 10:32 AM
I'm certainly not Superwoman. Superslacker, maybe. Life has its challenges, and I try to deal with them as best as I can, but parenting is never easy. Thanks for this post, and kudos to all the moms out there! May we all have an awesome Mothers Day. :)
Posted by: buzzvibe | May 07, 2011 at 10:55 AM
Thank you for being out there and doing what you do. We've been trying to get pregnant for years and in the meantime everyone I know, everyone - friends, relatives and even the irritating queen-of-the-smoke-break at work - have all had babies the first time they tried or oops, without even trying.
I can't talk about the frustration or the tests or the sadness on my blog, my supportive friends are almost making it worse by being so supportive and am just sick of even being happy for everyone else. I feel more like a horrible person than like superwoman because of that.
Today I got 4 posts into draft so I can keep up the blogging during the week, while I work full time all day at something I don't love doing, to start a business at night for something that I want to do. I try to remind myself that I am really very lucky that we are generally healthy and happy and my problems are 1st world problems, but lately I just want to cry. Can't even join #wineparty due to a massive time difference and can't have my own as have not had a drink in 6 months - yet another piece of the trying for baby thing. Dying for a glass of red and these days wonder if it is all worth it to spend the next few decades struggling through motherhood. Sorry to hijack your rant for my own, just needed to get this out into the universe.
BTW - my gift certificate vote goes to Jessica
Posted by: Anon today | May 07, 2011 at 11:32 AM
Honestly, I am tired of being a Superwife, Supermother, Superdaughter and I don't want to be Superanything anymore. I want my old life back where I am just a woman and that's what I'll try to be this weekend.
Posted by: Valentina@baby crib bedding | May 07, 2011 at 12:06 PM
Kit, the ranty posts are the good ones, whether or not they end on a high note. Some of us just need to feel as if we're not alone out here; so keep 'em comin'! Valentina, waaaay too often I feel the same way. I just wanna pop open a couple bottles of Smirnoff Ice and drink til I pass out and wake up on Monday morning energized and refreshed. But of course real life is waiting for me when I get off the toilet and exit my "escape room."
*Tipping a bottle to Kit* Happy Mother's Day, Kit, you have one helluva blog.
Posted by: TropicallyAnon | May 07, 2011 at 08:14 PM
Alcoholics? Really? I had no idea the folks who run the Boston Globe do not drink alcohol. Gee, I hope no one catches a reporter hanging out in a bar, because that would make them a hypocrite (but I sure would love to see a photo of one!). Look at the bright side, you know you've hit the big time when they are writing about you...or it was a slow news day. Because there is nothing going on like massive destruction from tornados, Pakistani's burning the flag...no news at all really! I love your blog! Don't worry, the Mom's have got your back.
Posted by: Arlee | May 07, 2011 at 10:21 PM
Ladies- as the mother of teenagers, I can only echo that's mom's comment. Mommies of the younger set- you poor things have no idea what you are in for. Teenagers will challenge every single belief you've ever held.
But we can do it. You can do it! Why? Because we're Mom's and it's what we do. ...and we have toys and #wineparty to take the edge off.
Posted by: Zoe Right | May 08, 2011 at 07:41 AM
So... I was going to write about why I'm supermom (because I am), and then I read all of the comments, and I have to say that while I'm pretty awesome, you ladies are FREAKING AMAZING. So even though I would love a new toy, I think some of you deserve it more. Moms make the world keep spinning!
And also? Kit, you are the only thing to get me through my day sometimes, so the Globe can just go.... do something unpleasant to itself. Screw them; we moms need you. And a place like this where we can talk about the things we're not supposed to talk about.
Posted by: Garden Variety Mama | May 08, 2011 at 09:07 PM
I'm (hopefully) a supermom! I am a high school teacher who deals with 180 16 and 17 year old students, heads the department I am a part of, works on special projects for the state and tries very hard to parent my creative, talkative first grader. I am constantly tired (my mother's day card said my child loved me more than I love sleep) and often overwhelmed. Every minute has to count with both my real child and the kids at school who come with problems that would overwhelm the most seasoned adult.
Posted by: Veggiemum | May 08, 2011 at 09:35 PM
You Rock.
Getting pregnant can be but is not always hard—Being pregnant is hard, Delivering a baby is hard, Parenting a newborn is hard, Parenting is just plain hard. Life is hard sometimes too, but we make it great in defiance of all those things that try and knock us down because you have the strength and courage to keep on going despite how hard it is to keep on going.
To all the women of the world who make this kind of love possible—we salute you.
Today is your Day. Keep the faith!
Posted by: HeadsUp_Dad | May 08, 2011 at 11:17 PM
That is total bullshit. I work a ridiculous job and happy hour is a wondrous thing sometimes. I'm also mom to two kids which often feels like a ridiculous job, but there's no official "end time" or co-workers to join you in a drink or two when the day is over. While I've never participated in #wineparty I think the concept is wonderful!
Posted by: Marta | May 08, 2011 at 11:28 PM