To be PERFECTLY honest I'm not much for sharing fantasies with a partner. After all, how much fantasy can you have in the two minutes AFTER you put the kids to bed and BEFORE they get up for one of a million infuriating reasons?
At this point in my life I'm more of a, "I'm already in the mood, that's why I said, 'yes' so let's get this party started (and finished so I can go to sleep.)" type of girl.
Here's another thing: some of the things I DO fantasize about when I'm alone? I would NEVER do in reality. First of all, some of them are physically impossible. (I learned this the hard way in college when I mentioned a certain position to my boyfriend and he almost dislocated his pelvis.)
Secondly, some of the things that turn me on IN THEORY, make me VERY STABBY in practice.
For example: I like to dream about a take charge, sweep me off my feet, romance novel sort of hero. But the truth is that I tend to be bossy in the bedroom. Oh SURE, I'm open to suggestions, but take it to the gentle insistence stage and you'll find yourself under a cold shower.
So I generally take my fantasies solo. When I was pregnant with my fourth child I had a recurring fantasy (that I'm not going to tell you because it was OVER THE TOP) that drove me wild. In fact, towards the end of my pregnancy it was better than sex at helping me orgasm.
Someone recently sent me a link to female porn. I'm obviously not a prude but looking at erections doesn't do it for me. I'm not a very visual person - it's not the visual of my fantasy that gets me going. It's the emotion.
When my husband and I were doing our homework a few months ago, one of the things that I came up with was to rendezvous at a public place and flirt like single people until we couldn't take it any more and then race home to celebrate like married people.
I think that this is exciting because you're in a public place so you have to behave appropriately, but you're there to be flirtatious so you have to get your point across in non-explicit ways. And while you both know that dessert is on the menu, you have to wait for it.
I think the anticipation is what does it for me.
What about you? Are you into fantasy? With a partner? Solo? Are you willing to share any ideas?
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