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May 25, 2010


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D H-Arza

Your blog is a daily must for me...My day is not complete unless I visit your blog..Your Hubby need to use the trash can asap...

Vicarious Chelsea

His boring old insecure attitude is clearly why she needs to add a little somethin' to their routine.
Um, and your hubs... that's gross. Maybe trim your bangs and add it, garnish style, to his dinner.

Jo and the Novelist

I just inadvertently broke wind while straddling The Novelist. Honestly, I thought it was going to be a silent one and then next thing I know there's this noise - like the sound of a toy trumpet.

That had *some* relevance when I started, but now I've forgotten what it was. Maybe the whole "It doesn't smell bad" line because I *just* used it myself.

Plus, toe nail clippings (and finger nail clippings) are a serious issue for me. But after the whole farting episode, I'm not sure I really have a leg to stand on for a full on confrontation.


Ugh the nail clippings!! What is it with that???

Men reading this.... FFS put them in the bin. The most disgusting story comes from my best friend's ex-husband who would put them in his teacup. Or wait... was that my ex? I get confused. They were both idiots.

Rant aside, if anyone would like to volunteer for my testing the vibrator on their scrotum, I'm game :) Just don't leave your nail clippings lying around afterwards, or I'll put that vibrator somewhere a whole lot less fun. Or more fun now that I think about it... whatever :)


Ohh wow! I think men sometimes forget that women find that kinda gross...

The hubby that is against his wife having a vibrator has a BIG problem, maybe he's insecure about his size? I don't know but I've been trying to live without my vibrator for a few months now and my gosh! I miss it! I hope he "grows up" and learns how to welcome it to the bedroom.



I love you!!!

Holly B

I love my husband, but I love BOB ( battery operated boyfriend) too !!


With great power comes great orgasms. That's why the Hitachi is a plug-in.


If my husband had said that to me? He would've had a vibrator shaped wound on his forehead. Just sayin...


I saw that comment and could NOT believe it! My husband would think it was totally hot.

Oh, I'm stabby today too!


Lordy, I'm glad all these people come here because I do.not.have.time to read all your blogs too.

I actually had to walk away from the computer after the "where's the 10th? On my toothbrush?" part cuz damn. Gave me the creepy-crawlies. Then Bee adds the teacup part & that they were both idiots.

My kids are mad that my snorting stifled-laughter is interrupting Elmo.

I love it here.

So glad my hubby is excited that I bought a vibrator. I lived with a Marine (probably not pertinent) for 3 years. He was also Catholic (definitely pertinent). I'm sure he wouldn't have wanted me to have a vibrator. One of the 3 times I thought he was going to kill me (not a euphemism) was when he figured out where I was heading as I kissed down his chest. I didn't even get to his bellybutton and he had a hold of me by my hair to stop my progress. Apparently he was not kidding when he said that he had had enough blow jobs from the bar girls in the Phillipines to last a lifetime, and that the future mother of his children didn't need to do *that*.

Then he had the audacity to tell my cousin (his BFF & brother Marine which is how we met) that we broke up because I WOULDN'T blow him. That's right "wouldn't" with a W. As if multiple requests were refused. More like didn't because I thought I'd get my neck snapped. As if I didn't know the gov't had trained him to kill people quietly; what I didn't know was if it would be painless so I decided not to find out.

Damn, once again I'm glad I didn't marry him.


Where have you been all my life? How am I just finding you now? And one last question, are you married to my husband to? Cut your nails over the potty at least!


Let's do one of those "Strangers on a Train" things . . . You kill my husband and I will kill yours.

Because I also have an idiot husband. I also have toenail and fingernail clippings on the bathroom floor, despite the fact that there is a toilet and a garbage can IN THE ROOM! And I am forever wondering what happened to #10. SO effing annoying.

It will be the perfect crime.

No one will suspect.


But he is good about vibrators. So there is that.


My husband would DIE if I suggested using a vibrator. He thinks it's gross and wrong and I can't bring myself to admit I've used one before with an ex and it was AMAZING.


First of all, if Mrs. D ordered a vibrator, I would find out where she ordered it and make sure they overnighted it. Pre-10am delivery. And call in sick that day.

Second, per Roxanne above, if I called my wife "disgusting" about anything I would end up with some kind of wound on my foreSKIN. If I still had one. Which I don't because of the last time I said something that fucking stupid to her.


Just buy her one for her birthday, honey :) Or buy it for yours...


Great minds and all that, Ms. Bee. Father's Day is right around the corner and I've been thinking about what I want to get this year. For my wife, I mean.

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