Dangerous Letters, Vol. 6

So what I learned this week is that while I MAY "be your hero," you are FAR, FAR less inclined to share your stories of youthful indiscretions under the name, FORNICATOR.

It's okay, I get it.  We'll get back to less judgmental topics next week.  Also, less creepy.  I realized tonight that 3 people tried to kill me at Blogging Dangerously this week.  Thank God I'm anonymous.

Before I forget, THANK YOU for your comments.  They keep me going during the craziness of the work week!

Here goes:

On the post, Single Sex Week & the Wasted Orgasm Theory:

I was a virgin until college and married the first man I did IT with, even though the sex was awful. (Catholic Guilt has nothing on it's lesser known cousin, Baptist Guilt.) I wish I had known about the wasted orgasm theory back then. It would have saved my father the cost of my first wedding.

signed, Just Another Mother

Kit: Since the average cost of a wedding these days is in the $16,000 range I am going to seriously consider marketing my theory as an alternative.  I dare say a few enthusiastic couples will jump at the opportunity and some fathers will, as you say, appreciate the savings garnered when the happy couple realizes that they are incompatible.

My boyfriend lived 2hrs away and went to a Christian college so when I'd come to visit I'd have to sneak in and out of his dorm window, luckily he was on the first floor. I crawled out the window one morning only to see a family across the street, in their yard getting ready to go to church, watching me. I waved politely and then ran to my car:) But trying to take a shower in the boys community shower room praying no one would come in was just plain crazy!

signed, Jillian

Kit: I still consider myself to be somewhat adventurous but when I think back on some of the things I did I am amazed/impressed/horrified by my courage/stupidity.

On the post, Love Letters:

Thank you actually for the tremendous support that this post received.  The letter writer was appreciative of my advice and the advice of all of the commenters.  I received a great question this week that I will publish on Monday.

Now for the comments:

I think from a man's point of view (but not this man!), many guys have trouble experimenting with certain things because they feel they are disrespecting their wife and/or the mother of their children. Some men feel certain acts/situations should not be shared with someone they love and respect.

I don't understand it because when it comes to me and my wife...it is whatever we feel at the time but I have had friends say they cannot do this or that with their wives because they respect them.

signed, Real Dads Hangout

Kit: I completely agree with this because it fits in perfectly with my BREAKUP sex theory which we'll discuss next week.

Vanilla? You? I was hanging out with friends last night & found out that one of the gals has a hyper-sensitivity to the word "pussy". It was like the word caused her physical pain! So no, vanilla you ain't!

Regarding the one trick pony's question: when he says those things have no place between a husband and wife, she should ask him who she should try them with!

signed, crazycajun in texas

Kit: There are a couple of "C" words that I am personally opposed to using.  One of them will be unveiled next week as well.  Words can have associations for people that make them offensive.  I think vanilla, or not is an attitude.

Better to try variety with the one you love than to try variety elsewhere... just sayin...

signed, Miss Ash

Kit: An excellent point!

On the post, The Time I Hooked Up with an Axe Murderer (Don't Judge):

Sooo...what happens next...???

signed, Deanna Hernandez

Kit: Since this was the resounding comment and I explained that NOTHING happened next in my following post I think we'll move right on past my first close encounter with DEATH.

On the post, Up and Down Like a Fiddler's Elbow:

Now that was a great story! I am so embarrassed to admit this, but I have a very vague memory of running around naked after hooking up with a guy in my dorm freshman year. Apparently I was ready to go back to my room... without my clothes?! But my door was locked b/c I didn't have my keys on me - surprise! I had to sneak back up to his room and pray to God no one saw me!! I still die of embarrassment every time I think about that one.

signed, Diane

Kit: There is nothing worse than Post Traumatic Stress Disorder on things that COULD HAVE HAPPENED but DIDN'T because you can't ever get past the WORST possible outcome.  I mean, even if you HAD been caught the consequences would be over by now, but since you weren't, it will NEVER be over.

You're my hero.

signed, Jennifer

Kit: Funny, because I would not have put this down as one of my proudest, most 'heroic' moments.

I used to work the night shift in hotel reception in the tropics. I saw more naked people in that job than I have had sex with. I'm not sure what it is that makes people sneak out to the pool to have sex naked (actually, no, I get that part) and leave the towels and clothes in their room. Along with their keys.
Or in the elevator. Apparently more people fantasize about having sex in an elevator than you would think. For future reference, hotel elevators are set to automatically return to the floor reception is on. The doors will automatically open. Generally you can see into the elevator from the reception desk. Hotel guests are more athletic than I had previously thought. Especially Dutch and German tourists. I don't know why the Dutch and German tourists especially.

signed, Sally Megan

Kit: Wow, I'm glad I don't have to clean hotels.  I know the CSI's always talk about what human petri dishes they are but good to know I shouldn't touch the elevator buttons - EVER.  Also, Dutch and Germans.  Interesting.

On the post, Criminal Minds:Single Sex Week:

It was hard for most people to get past Shemar Moore - and I completely agree.  In fact, Carmen Electra and I might have to take a break before I even finish this post.

Okay, back.

Dang. Creepy psycho dude. In my single days I nearly hooked up with a guy of questionable mental stability, only the girlfriends I was with knew what he was like and wouldn't let me leave with him. *whew*

signed, Buzzvibe

Kit: I wish I could say I learned from this but I'm pretty sure I didn't.  In fact, I'm almost positive that the Axe Murderer incident came after this.

Holy crap, that's like the opening sequence on "Cold Case" if only there was a shitty mid-90's Pearl Jam song playing too loudly in the background.

Once in college my roommate and I let some (semi-young but not definitely not cute enough) construction workers talk us into having a "party" with them on the roof of an unfinished hotel. After about 2 minutes we both realized all it would take is a quick knock on the head to kill us both and encase us in the drying concrete pool and we would NEVER BE FOUND. We practically threw ourselves down the stairs.

signed, Suzanne

Kit: Awesome story, only, of course, because you made it out alive.  You can never be too careful around wet cement.

Definitely a fan of not getting murdered.

Maybe he was attempting to be charming, ala So I Married an Axe Murderer. "How many people have you brutally murdered?" "Brutal is a very subjective word..." It's a thin line between charming and restraining order, truly.

Btw, finding your blog has been awesome! You added me to your Twitter, then I added you. However, it is abundantly clear that I am on the better end of this bargain after spending far too long last night reading a crapton your of posts out loud to my husband last night. While waiting for our kids to fall asleep. ;)

signed, Jessalee

Kit: Thank you.  Seriously, thank you because it's 1am and I am exhausted but I'm awake and blogging because you're awake and reading. So, you know, Thank you.

Okay, yeah, so I know this isn't really the point but...

I moved to Boston 5 months ago, and I've been hit by a car twice, TWICE! Yes, they were going slow enough that they didn't really hurt me, but TWICE!

The people here are very sweet, but they can't drive, and it scares me.

signed, Peggy Pigtails

Kit: Oh honey, you know those signs that say "Please Yield to Pedestrian Traffic"? DON'T BELIEVE THEM.  It's not true.  Not here.  No offense, but I would have thought that you would have learned that after the first time. ;)

Okay folks, that wraps it up.  Have a fantastic weekend and we'll be back next week with more sex.  I'm not sure what the theme will be but the overwhelming request was for SEX.  Happy to oblige.

Love,

Kit

Comments

[jatx]

Are you in Boston Miss Kit??? Headed there in June...with our kid. And some friends. Anything else we have to worry about besides psycho drivers?

Looking forward to next week....you're like my morning coffee. Only without the bad after taste that makes me have to brush my teeth.

[furiousBall]

i'd like to go on the record as being pro-sex

[@navigationdive]

What about a week on embarassing moments or getting caught.
This reminds me of the time i was having sex in my boyfriends fathers steam room. Quite amazing, but we were so into it that we didnt notice it flooding his basement. His dad came home and totally busted us! I had to sit in the little room shivering naked while they mopped up the mess.

[Sarah P]

These stories all make me thankful for marriage. I think I'll do my hubby tonight just to thank him.

[icelandic.chick]

I always meant to tell you about this one "incident" I had with a Dutch guy. And yes I can confirm that they are very athletic, although I didn't have my encounter in an elevator. But it was at a conference, we spent the whole day making sexual innuendos so by the time it ended (we're talking about 8 hours of sexual innuendos at a very serious conference) we quickly left and it was simply a "your place or mine?".... We ended up at mine and I must say it was the most mind blowing sex I've ever had! I recommend making sexual remarks for a loooong time as a prolonged foreplay. Just sayin! One of the best single sex I've had (and well I'm still single so I have plenty of stories).

[Fuegita]

I'm new to your blog, and I love it!